Do you ever feel that nagging guilt when you're not spending time with your child, or struggle to find the balance between work and personal life? As a mompreneur, I've faced this challenge head-on, especially with my daughter, Emma, being on summer break and spending time with her father. Join me in this episode as I open up about my journey to overcome productivity anxiety and discover the importance of balancing responsibilities with self-care.
Learn how our upbringing can impact our productivity anxiety and the constant feeling of not doing enough. Together, we'll uncover ways to break the cycle by embracing the pleasure of not doing anything, allowing our minds and bodies to recharge, and finding joy in activities that bring happiness. By taking care of ourselves, we can be fully present when spending time with our loved ones and create a more fulfilling life. So, if you're a mompreneur or a working mom who can relate to this struggle, tune in to this heartfelt episode as I share my insights and experiences to help you find your balance.
For more resources, blogs, & content, and Mental health merchandise, please visit:
Please like, subscribe, & write a 5 star! Dont forget to share this episode :)
Hi everyone, welcome back to the Imperfect Mellow podcast. This is Suzie recording. I'm so excited to be back just recording an episode I feel like I've been wanting to record for so long, but my anxiety won't let me. So Emma's been on summer break for a few weeks and that's been super hard because, as a mom and I'm not sure how many of you can relate to this I just feel guilty, like if I'm not spending time with her, if we're not doing something whether it be coloring, whether it be going somewhere playing outside, whatever it is like I just feel so guilty if I'm not spending time with her, or, yeah, just doing things with her. And I feel like, especially now that she's on summer break, she's been going over to her dad's house more and he's been keeping her for one or two weeks at a time, and so it's really hard Like I miss her so much when she's gone, and so when she's here, it's really hard for me to just I don't know like just relax and not do anything, like I just I don't know If you are a working mom out there or mompreneur, you know what I'm talking about And so that's been the daily struggle is really figuring out this work-life balance right. When I'm home, how much time am I spending working on like my business, my podcast, my blog, and then how much time am I spending with Emma, like what am I doing with my day? And so I just constantly feel like I always have so much to do on my to-do list and so little time. And even when I do get things done like off my checklist, like sometimes it feels like it's just not enough And I hate that sometimes. Let me know if you've ever experienced that. So I started doing a little bit more research into trying to figure out like why is it so darn hard for me to just not do anything? And it all goes back to our childhood. So if you're like me and you have a really hard time just not doing anything and just literally relaxing or just sitting without doing anything or without checking things off your to-do list, i feel like it all goes back to our childhood. So if you're like me, i don't know like the way that I was raised is, you know a lot of value was placed on school and getting things done and just being like a really high achiever and productivity Right, and so if you grew up with parents who were just constantly pushing you, you know, to do more, to do well in school, and you were raised with parents who really didn't show you much affection or give you much attention unless you got a good grade at school or unless you know you were doing something really great or just like receiving any kind of type of achievement. If you grew up with a parent like that, you kind of start to you kind of start to relate that back to your worth in a way Like your worth is dependent upon your productivity and like just how much work you could get done. And I feel like that kind of goes into adulthood, like it follows you now as an adult. It's kind of like the same thing, like we learn to put value on ourselves based on our achievements or like how much we're getting done And so it could be really hard to just relax and just not do anything Right. And so how do we even begin to break those cycles when we're just constantly feeling like you know we don't have enough time, we have so many things to do, but even when we are getting things done, it just feels like it's just not good enough, like there's more that we could be doing, and so productivity anxiety is exhausting, but how can we, what can we even do about it? I started thinking about this like well, what changes can we make if we are someone that struggles with productivity anxiety? like, how do you even begin to kind of break away from that? It takes a lot of patience and just a lot of to not tearing yourself down right If you're not doing anything, giving yourself some grace right And just forgiving yourself and learning to embrace the pleasure of not doing anything right, allowing your mind and your body to recharge, you know, doing things that bring you joy, and so whatever that is for you, you know it's going to be different for everyone, so for some it could be okay I'm going to go watch my favorite TV show, or I'm going to read a book, i'm going to go for a walk, spend time in nature, so whatever that is for you, and that actually helped a lot this week for me. I had a moment where I was feeling really anxious because I've been wanting to record, you know, a podcast episode. I've been wanting to write a blog, but I was experiencing at the same time, like that mom guilt of wanting to spend time with Emma, you know, wanting to do things with her wanting to play with her, because I knew that her dad was going to be picking her up at the end of the week, and so I was like, oh no, i have to take advantage right of, like, all the days where she's actually here, but at the same time I have so many things to do that I just keep pushing off, and you know. So I really had to think about well, are those things even important? Why, do you know? In the middle of that little anxiety episode, i looked at this stack of books that I had on my desk and I was like, oh my gosh, this is another thing that I've been wanting to do, that I haven't found the time to do, to just read my books, and I'm always buying new books on Amazon. I should probably stop and wait until I finish reading some of the books that I have. But anyways, i decided to just pick up one of the books and I started reading it, and next thing, you know, i finished the first chapter in the middle of the room that I was in. I was just standing there reading, and that felt nice. It felt nice to just give myself time to do things that I like to do, and I was still able to play with Emma afterwards, so it's not like I was neglecting her or ignoring her, but I think by taking care of ourselves and just doing things that we enjoy and that make us feel good, it'll put us even in a better mental space to be able to do all the things that we want to do with our kids and not feel anxious and be able to feel more relaxed. Because if I'm not doing anything for myself and I'm just pouring Emma's little cup but I'm not taking care of myself, am I really being fully present with her? Am I really being present in the moment of whatever it is that I'm doing with her? And sometimes I'm not. Sometimes it's hard. You could be spending so much time with your kids, but then your mind is just somewhere else. So I think at the end of the day I figured out even if it feels like you just kind of have to balance out your time with all the balance your time between all of the responsibilities that you have your to-do list balance that out with equal amounts of time with doing things for your mental health, like things that make you feel good and relaxed, and so I've been trying to practice that a little bit more. I'm not going to lie. Emma left to her dad's today and I was a little sad And I think it's just always going to be hard. I mean, she's six years old now and I always thought it would get easier with time, you know when she has to go to her dad's house and stuff. But it doesn't get easier, right. And so I kind of learned to also appreciate those times where she does go to her dad's house, because it does allow me that opportunity to get work done or get other things done right, like recording this podcast episode or writing a blog or even just reading a book. And so, i don't know, at the end of the day, i feel like it's just the way that you look at the situation, right, the way that we look at the situations, because I don't know, i could be here sad and I am sad, but at the same time I could see, i guess, the positive in the situation And so just getting things done and then just relaxing and taking time for me because when do you really take time for yourself, right, if you are a mom, if you are a working mom, if you are a mom pre-noir, like any free time that you get, you want to spend with your kids, but are you spending time for yourself as well? So that goes back right to balancing off your time with between your responsibilities and doing things for yourself care, and so if any of this resonates with you as the listener, maybe even if you're not a parent, but maybe you're trying to balance time right between spending time with your family, between work, between you know, all these other things that you have to do I think this applies to anyone is really balance, balance, balance right. Do things that make you happy, do things that help you relax. Well, thank you all for chiming in. This week I'm hoping to be recording more episodes. I have a couple of guests lined up, and so I'm really excited for that. To just jump back into the podcast world, i've had a lot of things going on these past few months, a lot of projects that I'm working on, but I love podcasting and I love sharing stuff about myself or things that I've learned or you know, just whatever comes to mind, and so I'm really excited to start podcasting again and bringing in some awesome guests. I'm trying to revamp my website, and so any who, if you are listening to this right now, shout out to you, and I hope that you will continue checking out my upcoming episodes, because they're going to be really good and I'm going to have really good speakers, and so thank you all for listening to this short episode. I hope something resonated with you and you were able to I don't know learn something. So thank you.